The archive

Confidential Files

Every story in the Phuket Confidential universe, numbered. Newest first.

File #054 The Twenty Minute Video Every forum says the same thing about Phuket jet skis: film everything. Nobody tells you to also ride it. Phuket Red Flags · Patong · 3 min

File #053 The 51 Percent The most expensive sentence in Phuket: "It's just paperwork." Farang Economics · Bang Tao · 3 min

File #052 The Lookout The oldest lie a tourist tells himself in Patong: nobody's watching. Phuket Red Flags · Patong · 3 min

File #051 The Tracker He tracked his bag all afternoon. It was twenty metres away, with the only person on the beach who knew whose it was. Holiday Romance Files · Nai Harn · 5 min

File #050 The Day Pass He bought a co-working pass so people would see him work. The barista next door actually does. Farang Economics · Rawai · 4 min

File #049 The New Rule Nine years of arguing every bill. Then he read about the new deportation rule. Phuket Red Flags · Patong · 4 min

File #048 The Fair Price He told me he never gets ripped off. He's paying 4,000 a month too much for his condo. Farang Economics · Chalong · 4 min

File #047 The Swipe Back Expat forums warn men about Thai girlfriends. Her friends have a checklist too. Phuket Red Flags · Chalong · 4 min

File #046 The Thirty Days Six winters of 59 days. This year the stamp said 30. Holiday Romance Files · Kata · 4 min

File #045 The Name on the Paper For six years it was "my villa." Since August it's "the place I'm renting." Farang Economics · Phuket · 4 min

File #044 The Afternoon Ban For years he said he never drank before five. "It's the law." In May, the law changed. Phuket Red Flags · Rawai · 3 min

File #043 The Same Sign They replaced the Bangla sign with an exact copy. He says it ruined everything. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 4 min

File #042 The Nine-Month Course Nine months of Muay Thai paid for. Two ticks in the book. Farang Economics · Cherngtalay · 4 min

File #041 The Direct Flight For eleven years, Phuket was too far for anyone to visit. Then it wasn't. Phuket Red Flags · Rawai · 4 min

File #040 The Last Two Words Two weeks of beach clubs. Five days of rain. He finally had to ask. Holiday Romance Files · Patong · 4 min

File #039 The Electricity Rate He came to buy a life. She came to check the electricity rate. Farang Economics · Cherngtalay · 5 min

File #038 The Afterparty At half past two, May stepped out of the car holding her heels and a bag containing one dress, a charger and a can of deodorant. Leo apologised for the stairs. She looked up at the building and began revising several things she had assumed about him. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 3 min

File #037 The Viewing Nathan was halfway through a video of his new Phuket apartment when the agent asked whether he wanted to see the bathroom. He lowered the phone, smiled and said he was still taking everything in. Farang Economics · Bang Tao · 3 min

File #036 The Clean Shirt Liv knew Ton was hiding something because he had ironed a white shirt. In three weeks together she had seen him wash a scooter, repair a loose shelf and fall asleep during a conversation. She had never seen him voluntarily introduce heat to clothing. Phuket Red Flags · Patong · 3 min

File #035 The Second Bill Eddie paid the bar bill with the calm, generous gesture of a man who wanted everyone at the table to notice how little the amount concerned him. The receipt went straight into his wallet. On the walk out, he told the group not to worry about it. Farang Economics · Rawai · 3 min

File #034 The Two Keys Aom placed the spare key beside Stefan’s coffee as though she were adding one final item to breakfast. It had a blue plastic cap and a tiny rubber sandal on the ring. Stefan turned it over, kissed her forehead and put it in his pocket. Holiday Romance Files · Patong · 3 min

File #033 The Shared Story By the time Aaron met Pim’s cousin for lunch, they had agreed that she worked in hospitality and that they had met while he was looking for somewhere to eat. Both statements contained enough truth to survive a casual inspection. Holiday Romance Files · Patong · 3 min

File #032 The Reserved Weekend At seven on Saturday, Bow had one eye made up, one eye unfinished, and three conversations open on her phone. The man she actually wanted to see had not replied. The man who had booked dinner was asking whether she preferred a car or a motorbike. Holiday Romance Files · Patong · 3 min

File #031 The Departure Envelope On his final morning, Robert placed 20,000 baht in an envelope. Farang Economics · Phuket · 2 min

File #030 The Seven-Day Regular By his fourth night, Kevin had a usual seat. By his fifth, he had a usual girl. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 2 min

File #029 The Work Name Everyone at the bar called her Ice. Her family called her Nam. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 2 min

File #028 The Sponsor Audit Graham did not mind helping Fon. He minded helping inefficiently. Farang Economics · Phuket · 2 min

File #027 The Hotel Call At 3:18 a.m., the hotel receptionist photographed Bee’s ID and placed it behind the desk. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 2 min

File #026 Mama-San Already Knew The Mama-san knew before everyone. Before the girlfriend in Germany. Before the other girl in the next soi. Usually before the man himself. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 2 min

File #025 Her Night Off Nina’s night off was Tuesday. This made Tuesday the most important night of Paul’s week. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 2 min

File #024 Good Morning, My Love At 9:03 every morning, Lars received the same message. Good morning my love. You sleep good? Farang Economics · Rawai · 2 min

File #023 Bar Fine Is Not a Contract Andrew paid the bar fine at 10:14 p.m. By 10:16, he believed he was in a relationship. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 2 min

File #022 The Bell Nobody explained the bell to Martin. Bangla After Midnight · Patong · 2 min

File #021 The Morning Routine Oliver arrives at the Muay Thai gym eleven minutes before the class ends. Chalong · 3 min

File #020 The Unposted Girlfriend Ice has taken seventeen photographs of Chris before she gets to drink her coffee. Phuket Red Flags · Rawai · 3 min

File #019 The Emergency Contact The receptionist asks Anna for an emergency contact. Phuket Red Flags · Bang Tao · 3 min

File #018 The Good Girl Discount Fern divides the restaurant bill before Alex has finished reaching for it. Farang Economics · Patong · 3 min

File #017 The Checkout Boyfriend At nine in the morning, Jonas asks reception for late checkout. Holiday Romance Files · Patong · 3 min

File #016 The Quiet Table Gary has been explaining Rawai to the new man for twenty minutes before he asks his name. Rawai · 3 min

File #015 The Breakfast Alibi Martin takes the breakfast photograph at 10:47 AM. Phuket Red Flags · Phuket · 3 min

File #014 The Rain Check At three in the afternoon, Luke is standing outside a minimart in Patong wearing a plastic raincoat that has already failed. Holiday Romance Files · Patong · 3 min

File #013 The Close Friends List Nok knows it is becoming serious because she has acquired a green circle. Holiday Romance Files · Patong · 3 min

File #012 The Spare Helmet By the fourth date, Ben has bought a second helmet. Holiday Romance Files · Rawai · 3 min

File #011 The Fourth First Date Every January, Adam and Lin had their first date. They always met at the same restaurant in Rawai. Holiday Romance Files · Rawai · 2 min

File #010 The Villa Viewing Lucas believed the property agent liked him. There were signs. Farang Economics · Phuket · 2 min

File #009 Exclusive on Weekends Chris and May had a modern relationship. They were exclusive from Friday evening until Monday morning. Phuket Red Flags · Kata · 2 min

File #008 The Return Ticket Martin changed his flight twice. The first time was romantic. Holiday Romance Files · Phuket · 2 min

File #007 The Fitness Expat Jake moved to Phuket for Muay Thai. He made this clear in his bio. Chalong · 2 min

File #006 She Never Asked for Money Nok never asked Daniel for money. Daniel explained this to everyone. Farang Economics · Phuket · 2 min

File #005 The Profile Picture Boyfriend Ben and Fah became a couple online several weeks before they became one in person. Phuket Red Flags · Phuket Town · 2 min

File #004 The Man Who Hated Bangla Richard hated Bangla Road. He said so constantly. Patong · 2 min

File #003 The Beach Club Accountant Sophie did not mind expensive afternoons. She minded inaccurate mathematics. Farang Economics · Bang Tao · 2 min

File #002 The Last Night Rule They agreed not to make the final night emotional. Holiday Romance Files · Rawai · 2 min

File #001 The Domestic Mirage By the ninth morning, there are two iced coffees on the table. Holiday Romance Files · Kata · 3 min